be nice to me–i’m magic

You might not know it, but you’re going to have to trust me, I’m in no way a lying sack of crap. I have nothing to gain by stretching my perceived reality to impress you. I only mention this because I’m about to say something that might shake the very foundation of your being.

I can make things happen just by threatening aloud to blog about them.

Case in point: This 1-quart (32-ounce) carton of Silk vanilla creamer. We’ve been buying at least three of the 16-ounce cartons a week since we first tried it. That might sound like a lot, but there are two coffee drinkers in this household and we make our own coffee every morning. (Well, Tom makes our coffee.) I’ve always questioned why larger cartons weren’t available, both for cost and packaging waste concerns.

Private whining is one thing, but yesterday I ratcheted it up a bit. I told Tom I was going to take my kvetch public. A few months ago, I mildly tore into Simple for having ugly vegan shoes while the Sugar, their super comfy and sweet-ass shoe, was only available in suede. Well, Simple caught wind and I got a comment from them. Why not do the same to Silk? They’ve got to have marketing assistants mining away online.

So then this morning—and remember: NOT a lying sack of crap here—at Whole Foods, what do I find? Exactly what I wanted. For $2.69, twice as much creamer as the $1.69 carton (which is $1.99 at Fred Meyer).

Don’t worry. I will do what I can to not abuse this newfound power.

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